SURRENDER THROUGH SURRENDER
Strange as it may sometimes seem, our life of active addiction was in large part an effort to find some peace, even serenity. Thus it was that we constantly pursued the passing comfort experienced in addiction in what was truly a futile search. All we found, of course, was that momentary relief that soon passed. Well, that's not all we found. No, we also found much misery, sorrow, and pain. We also discovered whatever we were seeking to run away from through our addiction was still running right beside us whenever the high wore off. Consequently, the misery, the sorrow, the pain never faded away, but only grew stronger. Indeed, as a result, life became more stressful, serenity became more distant.
What a dilemma we faced! What, we asked ourselves, could we do? For many, the answer seemed to be to fight back by ourselves, failing to realize that it was doing things our own way that got us in so much trouble in the first place. And so it was that we fought and lost-over and over again. Battered and bruised-in body, mind, and spirit-having lost battle upon battle, we finally came to realize and accept that all this fighting clearly was not working. It was not working for we were fighting a power greater than ourselves that was destroying our sanity and threatening life itself. Fighting this disease was clearly not the answer. What, then, could we do?
The answer to that question was a simple one, but one that went against the grain. What we could do was surrender. Strange as it might seem victory could be had by surrender. Through this surrender we could find serenity. This surrender meant acknowledging and accepting that this disease was far too powerful to overcome. It meant my own will and ways would never be successful by themselves. It meant letting go of my own self will run riot, and opening my heart and spirit to the will and ways of the God of my understanding. In an amazing way what we sought so long in addiction, we began to experience by surrender to it. We began to experience hope that had eluded us for so long. It was a hope that let us know that the serenity we had sought for such a long time could actually be ours. It could be ours because the bondage of addiction was giving way to the freedom of recovery-recovery born of and nutured by surrender. As we dropped the tools used for fighting we were free-in surrender-to pick up the tools for our new way of living. These tools of letting go and letting God brought us ever closer to serenity.
And so it is that serenity begins to be ours. What does this really mean? It means we begin to and live with and inner peace. We have calmness of spirit and stillness of heart. In our serenity, cluttered minds and confused thinking are replaced with minds that are clear and thinbking well focused. With serenity we face the difficulties and problems of life not with dread and fear, but with hope and faith. The challenges of life are no longer seen as obstacles to be run away from but as opportunities to be embraced. Indeed, in our serenity we no longer look at life as a heavy burden to be borne with great difficulty. NO, now we see life as the wonderful gift that it is. Now we live this gift with the enthusiasm of being free, the excitement of having hope. Now life is one of believing-in self, our sisters and brothers, our God. Serene in mind and spirit, truly living a life of serenithy, we look back with gratitude, we look forward with hope, we look at today with acceptance.
What a great thing surrender turns out to be. It not only brings us out of addiction, it shows us the way to what we were seeking for so long. That serenity we wanted so very badly, we have found for we have surrendered. Serenity through surrender now is ours.
It is with much joy and gratitude that the Hezekiah Movement celebrates the return of summer! The past months have been a time of many blessing for us. Most important, was the opening of our first Island of Hope. It is through your great generosity and support that this has happened and now more and more people are getting help in their efforts to be free from addiction. We are most thankful to you for all the help you have given. Your help in the past has been so important for us to get this far.
Besides the blessing of our new Island of Hope, we have experienced a growth in the Hezekiah Movement retreats. These retreats are providing wonderful spiritual experiences for so many in recovery who have never had such oportunities before. In addiction, more men and women are joining in with us throughout the week for prayer and meditation and they are finding suupport and encouragement as they go forward in their new life of recovery from addiction. Again all this is possible because of your care and generosity.
Your help means so much to so many. I pray that you will be filled with Easter joy. May this Summer be a time of freedom, peace, hope and new life.
In Gratitude and Peace.
Fr. Joe